Secret of Dewi Laila's Tears After Winning Gold Medal at Thailand SEA Games

The tears finally broke not at the decisive moment, nor when the last bullet left the rifle barrel. Dewi Laila Mubarokah's tears spilled only after everything was over. When two SEA Games Thailand 2025 gold medals had officially become hers, and the big secret she'd kept for months no longer needed hiding.

At Photharam Shooting Range, Bangkok, Saturday, December 13, 2025, Dewi Laila perfectly completed her mission. She claimed gold in the women's 10m Air Rifle team event alongside Dominique Rachmawati Karini and Yasmin Figlia Achadiat, then completed it with gold in the individual 10m Air Rifle event. A crowning achievement cementing her name as one of Southeast Asia's finest shooters.

Yet beneath that calm, precision, and near-flawless breath control, Dewi Laila was secretly fighting another battle unrecorded on the scoreboard. She competed at the 2025 SEA Games while four months pregnant.

"Alhamdulillah, I truly didn't expect this. I thought I'd return empty-handed. Maybe clinging to silver or bronze," said Dewi Laila, voice trembling after the match.

She kept the pregnancy tightly guarded. Only a handful knew—Indonesian Shooting Association officials, coaches, and one fellow athlete. Even Dominique, her roommate and final rival, remained completely unaware.

"We shared a room and Dominique didn't even know," she said, smiling as she glanced toward Dominique.

Keeping the secret meant maintaining normalcy throughout training camp, physical tests, and competitions. Early pregnancy proved particularly challenging, especially when nausea struck without relief.

"During the first trimester, I felt nauseous. But to avoid suspicion, I bore it alone. Only told my husband," she shared.

Another concern emerged from an often-overlooked detail: vitamin consumption. As an elite athlete, every substance entering her body must comply with anti-doping regulations. Dewi fretted that prenatal vitamins might violate rules.

This anxiety was resolved through official consultation. With her team, Dewi coordinated with Indonesia Anti-Doping Organization (IADO), reporting vitamin usage via the Therapeutic Use Exemption (TUE) system regulated by World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA).

This step brought calm amid pressure. Her pregnancy remained protected, regulations were followed, and Dewi competed with greater peace of mind.

Her coach provided crucial support. Pre-final tension proved unavoidable.

"I told my coach I was nervous. He simply said: 'Breathe in, control your breathing, just like regular training,'" she recalled.

That simple advice steadied her during the eight-shooter final. Dewi trailed initially but gradually climbed back. Rivals fell one by one until only two Indonesians remained: Dewi versus Dominique.

Cheers followed each shot. Finally, Dewi secured gold while Dominique took silver. They embraced on the range, creating an unforgettable emotional moment. The tears finally flowed unrestrained.

Dominique expressed shock when the secret emerged.

"I actually dreamed Dewi was pregnant," Dominique revealed.

"When I found out it was true, I was stunned. I immediately said: 'See? I knew she was pregnant.'"

Tears again filled the arena—not just from Dewi, but also from those who'd guarded her secret.

In the stands, husband Fathur Gustafian—also a shooter—watched with mixed emotions. For him, this victory transcended medals.

"We strengthened each other, trusted the process together," Fathur said.

Continuing the pregnancy during SEA Games preparations wasn't easy. Their first child was barely two. Family plans required reconsideration.

"We thought about postponing. But the doctor said: 'This child has a right to life, its own destiny,'" Fathur shared.

From then, their resolve solidified. Dewi took doctor-prescribed vitamins, underwent regular checkups, and trained under strict supervision—all exercised with utmost caution.

"Allah has destined every creature. We just strive to protect and give our best," he affirmed.

When two golds were finally won, the struggle found its meaning. Dewi bowed her head, gently touching her belly.

"Though you can't hear me yet, I said: Thank you for enduring, for fighting alongside me," she whispered.

For Dewi, Thailand's golds marked personal growth. At 2021 Vietnam SEA Games, she won individual 10m Air Rifle gold and team silver. Shooting wasn't contested at 2023 Cambodia SEA Games.

"Dewi desperately wanted to prove she still competes. That's why she insisted on participating in 2025 SEA Games," Fathur explained.

On the range, Dewi is known for mature emotional and breath control. At SEA Games 2025, that calmness proved born not just from rigorous training, but from faith that excellence and life can coexist—when pursued with honesty, discipline, and full responsibility.

Those two golds became more than medals. They transformed into a story of courage to keep secrets, compliance with rules, and the determination of a mother who chose to stand on the firing line while carrying profound responsibility within.

"This is 'Si Utun's' blessing," Fathur smiled, referring to their unborn child.

Dewi and Fathur's journey continues. Beyond these achievements, one dream persists: sharing the world's grandest sporting stage.

"Dewi dreams of competing with me at the Olympics—since I've already participated," Fathur revealed.